What I'll Never Tell You

The words burnt in my throat as I sat there, unable to vocalize what I so desperately want to say. I knew I’d be smothered by your charm but I was lost in you and that’s funny cos I knew exactly what I would have said.

I would have told you that I want you, in more ways than one. Everytime you leave, the smile on your face leaves an imprint in my brain.

I would have told you that my heart skips a beat and butterflies take over in my stomach when I hear from you. Or see your name pop up on my screen.

I would have told you that you ignited something in me. Something that caused a flutter in all of me.

I would have told you that I want to sit on your kitchen counter as you make toast and eggs at 6 in the morning.

I would have told you that I miss your weird sense of humour that used to make me laugh so hard as u regale me with your stories.

I would have told you that I miss that smirk on your face when you win the weird conversations we had.

I would have told you that I want to feel your arms around me or your hand on my back as you guide me through the crowded streets.

I would have told you that I love your flaws (as bountiful as they may be cos I sure as hell ain’t perfect) and that I love our differences though they can be a pain at times.

I would have told you that I want to learn something new about you everyday because I want to be able to say, one day, that I know all of you.

I would have told you that I want to curl up in bed with you as we watch movies at midnight with our legs tangled in the sheets.

I would have told you that I want to be what you reach for when you wake up in the middle of the night.

I would have told you that sometimes it’s easy to not get affected by you and what you do/say but yet at times, it’s the hardest shit ever.

And finally, I would have told you that I want to make you happy.

In the simplest form of these words, I won't chase after you when you walk away. 

Hugs,
Nora